One of the reasons people do not approach people face-to-face has to do with shyness, rather than for strategic reason, so you need to overcome this shortcoming but first what is shyness?
Dr. Bernardo J. Carducci identified 3 components of shyness:
1. Excessive Self-Consciousness- you are overly aware of yourself, particularly in social situations.
2. Excessive Negative Self-Evaluation- you tend to see yourself negatively.
3. Excessive Negative Self-Preoccupation- you tend to pay too much attention to all the things you are doing wrong when you are around other people.
But how do you overcome shyness and improve your skills on how to approach people face-to-face?
First, it is essential to change your state of self-Consciousness to that of Self-Awareness by realising that most people are not really looking at you but at themselves or busy thinking inwardly of themselves, so you should understand the particular reason why you are shy and bring this awareness into your inner thought, in order to overcome it, because self awareness is the beginning of change.
Second, instead of seeing yourself through the lens of negativity, find your strengths and explore them to your advantage. This is true because we are all different and if everyone is the same, the world will be a boring place. You need to affirm in your mind that you can do it because what we think in our minds carry a lot of influence in the way we behave, so think and communicate positively in your inner mind about your ability and it will gradually improve your self esteem when you approach people face-to-face.
Third, when we pay too much attention to the things we do wrong when we meet people face-to-face, it begins to demoralise us and eventually we quit. However, quitting reinforces shyness and the inability to change for the better, so use the problem as a tool for self reflection and to question yourself on the 'whys' and 'hows', in order to discover alternative ways to improve yourself.
Fourth, fear of rejection should not deter you because rejecting your idea or what you are selling is not a rejection of your personality, so you do not need to take it too personal if you fail to achieve your objective because even some ideas and strategies of some famous people in the world are being rejected on a daily basis.
Fifth, avoid perfectionism and do not seek to be what you cannot because we often make the mistake of unfairly comparing ourselves to people who are unlike ourselves, therefore setting unrealistic goals for ourselves; like why can't I be like Mr X who recruits 10 affiliates daily, but ignorant of the fact that you have other strengths different from Mr X that you can employ and be more successful, which you ignore because of the obsession with Mr X.
Sixth, practice makes perfect so it is important to develop social and interpersonal skills which come through practice and experience. This means the more you engage people face-to-face, the easier and more confidence you have subsequently, and there is nothing bad in doing some rehearsals before you engage in face-to-face communication.
In conclusion, I will advise that there is no one way of engaging in face-to-face communication, so it is important to apply skills you are comfortable with, while you practice others you think are important but not comfortable with. Quitting should never be an option, but persistence and determination to improve is the key.
less
One of the reasons people do not approach people face-to-face has to do with shyness, rather than for strategic reason, so you need to overcome this shortcoming but first what is shyness?
Dr. Bernardo J. Carducci identified 3 components of shyness:
1. Excessive Self-Consciousness- you are overly aware of yourself, particularly in social situations.
2. Excessive Negative Self-Evaluation- you tend to see yourself negatively.
3. Excessive Negative Self-Preoccupation-
...
more
